


Abyss

by Pan_and_Proud (Oliviapicklescott)



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, First Time, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Human Laura, Human/Vampire Relationship, Poetic, Porn With Plot, Smut, Vampire Carmilla, hunter laura, philosophical
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-28
Updated: 2018-12-28
Packaged: 2019-09-29 02:34:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17194871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oliviapicklescott/pseuds/Pan_and_Proud
Summary: Laura hunts the elusive vampire to the abandoned cathedral which she has made her home. Upon arriving there, she is forced to come face to face with a monster, and the very idea of monster. Can one be a monster and still be a lover? Or maybe even, all lovers are monsters.Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.-Friedrich Nietzsche





	1. Ice

I’m finally here.

Lifeless snow covers bare ground, sucking away nutrition from any plants there might have been in the garden. But nothing living has been here for a while, I am the first. Gentle winds blow the snow off the precipice.

Upon the peak, an ancient cathedral stands alone. Gigantic, build upon a mountain to reach closer to God. Now, a shell of the holiness it tried to become. Nobody wished to make the journey even for their religion. The once noble church has become decrepit. The gargoyles meant to ward off evil now seem as if they themselves have been corrupted. They coil downward, fangs bared. Their pupiless eyes seem to be following me across the courtyard. The lofty towers end in spikes, one of which is broken off. I step over a broken cross, fallen from the top of the cathedral. The gargoyles continue to stare.

Numb fingers brush the rotten oaken door, fear tingling through them. Deep breath pushes the shiver from my spine, and the door swings inward.

I reach down to the revolver on my belt before proceeding inside. The only light peaks in from window frames were stained glass once colored it. A humongous chandelier looms over the great hall. Rags, which were once embroidered tapestries, hang from the grey stones. Gothic suits of armor stand at attention. And the music oh god the music. I pull the revolver from its holster, its silver reflecting the low light.

The music. The music of insanity and passion echo through the cruciform hall. The notes slither over the cobblestone floor, scales dragging over rocks. I feel the venom run under my dress, into frozen veins. Too alive for this place, too variegated. The melody is soft but quick, predatory but not explicit. Yet, it coils around me, holding me paralyzed just over the threshold.

I snap out of the hypnosis, my adjusted eyes scanning the hall for the source. Desperately, I swing around searching for the birthplace of this eerie sounds.

High up upon a balcony an ancient organ gives note to the sounds which hold doom and salvation. A shadow manipulates it. Shaky hands raise the gun.

_Boom_

The bullet ends the music. The shadow flicks out of sight, away from my crossfire fires. A laugh fills the ruined hall, connoting the same ideals as the music. I cock the gun and search for the shadow’s whereabouts.

So close, so close. The last six months, all for this. I can’t mess up.

“I wondered when you would grace me with your presence. Your timing is inopportune though, I was relishing in my music,” the deep voice growls.

I shoot again in answer, the click vibrates across the room. The adrenaline is exploding through me. Every shadow, not just my target, laughs, teasing me.

The shadow perches on a flying buttress, crimson eyes stabbing through the black. Watching me load more bullets with what seems to be amusement.

“You’ve stalked me for so long. Why are you trying to kill me I wonder?”

Anger is stoked by her words.

“Because you are a bloodsucking fiend! You have been brought back continuing your unnatural life just to suck it away from others.”

I shoot twice, and again the grotesque demon darts away, laughing again.

“Oh really? Is that why? As most likely know, I’ve never killed a human under any circumstance. I’ve bought uncooked meat from butchers, bloody and fresh cut. I never stole feti, or feasted upon corpses as some of my brethren do. Yet, you call me a monster? I stay in abandoned works of art, not missed by the races of ungrateful man. Yet, you call me a monster? Hunt me as you would hunt a beast? You’ve killed many other vampyres, although most pests, you’ve taken far more lives than I. Yet, you call me a bloody monster?”

The anger melts the ice blocks my veins.

I push the trigger down, again and again as the shadowy figure evades my projectiles.

“Your kind killed my family! They tore away my home, my heart, my wealth, all of you are the same, claiming others for self-interest. And you all wish to devour innocent flesh and blood, your very existence is parasitic.”

I run out of bullets, grabbing more silver covered led from my leather pouch. I fumble pushing them into the cylinder. I get a clearer view of the vampire, relaxed on the great chandelier, leathery wings outspread and fanged mouth pressed with amusement.

“I am not my of my kind little one, and you know it. I think I know the reason why you are hunting me, it has to do with the first time we met when I-”

My bullet misses, but hits the chandelier, serving its chain. The round behemoth crashes to the ground, I barely roll out of the way. It blows centuries of dust into the thin air. I can not breathe, I can not see.

I’m thrust into the air, tight fingers curled around my neck. Bat wings beat, clearing the cloud of dust away, before dissipating into dark smoke. The revolver falls to the floor with a clatter.

“Now, interrupting is rude. Where was I…” The girl holding my dangling a foot above the ground looks my age but is probably hundreds of years older. Dressed in all black to contrast ghost white skin. Her dark wavy hair is pushed behind her ears. Copper eyes shine with something that scares me, although not the same killing instinct other vampyres seem to have. A half smile reveals fangs, in their sheathed faze, she has not drawn them.

“The first time you met me? What was I doing? Buying a book, a book. In a musky leather tempered shop. A manuscript by Descartes if I remember correctly. You came into the shop right after my, triggering that terribly shrill bell sound. You asked me about Descartes, if I believed that the world could be an illusion of an evil demon. I said the world was made up of many evil demons’ illusions. If I remember correctly, you laughed, and we talked for a long time.”

My legs flail above the ground and I let out a choking sound.

“We talked about reality, and books, and even shared some favorites. I winked at you when you said you had to leave, and damn you seemed fascinated and reluctant to leave me, I was the same. You had uttered a cute goodbye, and as I strolled away, you must have caught a glimpse of my fangs, as you then drew your gun on me. You didn’t shoot though, you couldn’t bring yourself to.”

She loosens her grip only slightly and a satisfactory smile widens.

“You are in the business of killing monsters. That is why you didn’t shoot. You have ulterior motives for pinning me here too. You know you can’t kill me. I wonder what drove you here. Curiosity? Justice? Someone adequate to discuss Descartes with? Or maybe was it Romantic Infatuation.”

My eyes widen slightly. “Yes, that is it. You don’t want to kill a monster, you want to love someone as alone as you in this cold dog-eat-dog world. I don’t know whether that is noble or pathetic.” Her grip loosens completely, dropped me to my knees, I gasp.

She stares at me, and after I regain breath I stare back. Fangs ever so slightly poke out of her lips.

Suddenly, those lips are on mine, if only for a brief second. Warmer than I thought death would ever be. So soft, so sweet.

She turns away. “There is a bedroom upstairs, you can stay here for as long as you want. You can kill me if you desire. I’m not a monster, but I am someone who suffers from acute existential dread, feel free to remove the chains of this body from me.” She kicks my revolver toward me.

She walks cape billowing behind her with every step.

I leave the gun on the floor.

I already miss those lips.


	2. Inferno

I am enveloped by pure elan. The merciful caress of Cronus stops the lumbering giant of time, bringing him to his knees. Time has ceased affecting my body long ago, but he still manages to be the driving force of all existence around me, but finally, he has relinquished. He has let me free, as a parental songbird watches as their children fly. And I do fly, I’m soaring in heavenly clouds of joy.

The freedom resounds through my veins, angels blow holy trumpets. The echo of their ethereal music resounds throughout the caverns of blood and heart. The notes synchronize ramming through my bones, shaking them in the best way possible. The abandon, oh god the freedom.

I cannot put a name to the new feeling, that is enlivening my cadaverous body like a motor operating upon an automaton. It awakens me from a slumber that has lasted centuries, it is my light penetrating the night which was embossed with the nightmares of eternity to wake me from my sleep. Everything is so elucidated. What is this? What is this mirac-

“Laura,” I gasp as she bites my lower lips. I break our kiss and look into her chocolate eyes, so full of wonder. Our gaze is intensely inwoven, knotted to the point where trying to undo it is hopeless.

“I love you,” She whispers in a breathy voice. My fingers brush across her skin, skin that shines in the moonlight that tumbles in from the broken window. The room should be cold, we are in the mountains, a good part of the room is open to the elements, somehow we aren’t.

“I love you too,” I grin and shuffle my feet towards her, running my thumb over her soft lips, and a hand across her shoulder. She lets out a moan.

Oh shit. Something primal awakens from within me, a growl comes through me. I push my lips roughly against the hunter’s. I back her up against the bed, which she falls into. She lies looking so… pleasing.

Somehow she both looks endearing and stokes some sort of fire within my lower stomach. Her magenta dress hugs her curvy form, ruffles flow down her legs. A tight corset keeps pushes her chest up, although, already being extraordinary it needs no pushing. Her cleavage is visible as the corset cuts fairly low. Her short hair has sprawled up and head tilted back revealing her virgin neck, making her look disorganized and it is doing unwanted things to my mind. As my eyes wander, I feel my fangs creep out of their hiding place immediately extending to full length.

I see in her face she spots my demonic accessories.

“I-I’m sorry it just happens sometimes, I know I’m a bit of a monster but I really don’t want to hurt you…” I stammer. Over the past few months, I’ve grown to love the human despite her quirks, and I couldn’t imagine her taking me as a monster.

These past seven months have been wonderful since this girl who came to kill me stayed up residence. We’ve talked about Descartes, our childhoods, the going on’s of the kingdom and everything in between. I remember the first kiss, it lit a small fire in my vacuous torso, which soon caught unto the rest of me. She is the biggest miracle, something I didn’t believe in. A little angel venturing into the house and heart of a devil. I finally feel connected, feel complete, and I want to make her oh so oh so happy.

“...I didn’t mean for that…” She cuts me off with a desperate kiss.

“I really don’t care right now love. You aren’t a monster, believe me, I know them, I hunted the absolute worse for five years. A monster cannot and will not love.” Explosive lust resides upon her face, her voice has deepened in anticipation. The pulchritude contained in one human, her mind, her body, her soul, it still very much blows me away.

“Laura, I’ve lived a lot longer than you, trust me, monsters love. In a sick, destructive love. We love as fire loves. Whatever we touch disintegrates in the grasp we try which we try to caress the object of affection with. We consume our loved ones and loved things, reducing them to lifeless ash, while we rage in an inferno. I don’t want to do that to y-” I avoid the saint’s gaze.

“No, you aren’t like that. Maybe you love as fire loves, but passionate and caring. We warm each other, you are not an overpowering fire. I’ve met many, and I’ve extinguished the ones that burn. You do not burn, you just push back ugly frostbite.” She smiles.

How can anybody be this amazing, be this spectacular? How can anybody love a monster?

I embrace the beautiful oddity and kiss her making sure to hold my fangs at bay.

I push her down gently unto the majestic posted bed and fall lightly on top of her, only separating lips for less than a mere second.

“My love for you is sempiternal,” I whisper into her ear before running my tongue along it. She laughs, being the most endearing creature she is, and makes my face heat up more. “Always the poet aren’t you?”

“Always,” I grin back joyously.

She moans lightly, gripping the comforter as I roll my tongue over her neck. She arches up to secure more contact. This subsequently, drives me completely insane.

“May I um…” I can’t find the words.

“Remove my clothes? Yes, you may…” She does not sound like herself anymore, yet sounds exactly like herself.

I struggle with the corset, which amuses her, finally I loosen it enough to take it off. Her dress underneath, is thin and very tight. My mind goes completely blank with only one desire remaining: I want it off.

I unbutton the small metal bit at the back of the billowing dress, and peel the damn cloth off her, revealing the most beautiful sight my eyes have ever laid witness to.

“Oh god cutie…how are you this magnificent,” I put my mouth on her now bare collarbone, sucking as I take in the sight of her ethereal body. Control, what is that? I just want to make her completely mine, I want to show it with marks and kisses.

“Love, may I see you t-” She moans when I hit a sweet spot on her pectoral. She grabs my hair pulling me down to her chest, and I obey her tug.

I remove the cloak from my back, and throw it to the side. I try to make a show of stripping off my vest and button down. I slowly and awkwardly pop each button out, but Laura seems to enjoy it, her eyes eat up each piece of skin I reveal. My bare skin usually feels freezing without several layer of clothes to cover it. Luckily, I don’t seem to be having that problem tonight.

I get excited as my tongue slides up the top of her right breast. I can feel my heart pounding both in my chest and between my legs, goddammit.

My tongue circles around her hard nipple. I pinch the sensitive flesh between my teeth and get an adorable whimper. I continue to roll the bud between my teeth as the sounds of pleasure get louder and louder, I pull back and she arches up to meet my demands once again. She pushes her hips up into mine, and I force them back to the bed.

I bring my mouth back to her full lips. I kiss her with the supernova of passion exploding through me, and a the gravity of a galaxy pulls our bodies together. Her hands run all over my back pushing our chests together we already feel like one person, we are moving to the same beats.

I move my hands down her chest, making sure to engage my nails on the way down. My love volunteers her chest to me, and I cautious brush over them. A soft noise subtly begs for more. I thumb her nibbles, squeezing and rolling them between my thumb and forefinger. God she is the most beautiful person I could ever imagine. Scratch that, I could have never imagined such a divine being.

“Ah, please Carm!” she moans, a certain craving showing a side of her infused with extreme ardor.

“Please what love?” I roll the words slowly, kissing below her belly button.

“Just please take me, go inside me, please,” such aridity filters through her warm breathy voice. She spreads her legs slightly, encouraging me, ha, like I needed any more encouragement.

I press my hand against her cream colored underwear. Eliciting a richly sweet moan. The arousal beginning to overpower my mind slightly

“Hey love, this is my first time... “ I warn with a slight embarrassment. A creature of shadow who has lived for long years but not lost their virginity is definitely... something. I was just waiting for the perfect person, now I finally have her.

“D-don’t worry,” she groans lightly, “it is mine to, but I want this so badly.”

I push away the fabric, brushing her wetness directly. Oh my god. I should take my time and relish this feeling, but I can’t help wanting more. I thrust two finger deeper inside, marvelling at how easily she takes them.

“Oh,” she whimpers softly. We meet eyes as I find a rhythm. We both completely understand how intimate this all is, how much trust we share. That this isn’t just for the pleasure, but to solidify a bond deeper than flesh and higher than blood. Her moans and my insertions become one.

I gain courage, fired and pressed hard courage, enough to insert another finger into someone so precious. Her hands jump to my back.

“Don’t stop please, just don’t…” I feel nails dig into me.

“Oh darling why would I ever?” I push harder. She screams again.

She looks so beautiful under me, her flushed skin is composed of stardust. Her eyes, the pupil devouring the dancing hazel iris from excitement. With every movement she arches into me with her divine hips. She is the only art I ever need, the only wonder I ever need to experience. I can’t imagine having gone eternity without this.

“Oh, oh fuck Carm, something is happening!” It is getting harder and harder to push into her body, and her moans are getting louder and louder. I feel myself getting more excited.

Her screams get more frequent and more throaty.

“Ah, Carm, oh my, fu-, Carmilaaaaa!” She cries louder, hips being thrown up into the air.

Then she lays down for rest, curling the covers around her. My heart becomes filled with soft warmth, a warmth much like freshly baked pastries and soft wandering sunlight. This wonderful creature is mine and I’m her’s, we, as we are now cannot exist without each other. I plop down on top of her.

“Ugh, Carm, you are squishing me,” She lets out a jolly giggle.

I roll off and embrace her with both my arms and legs.

“I love you, you are my dove who brings the hopeful sunrise and bears the promise of a sunken paradise.” I gently kiss her neck.

“Always so poetical aren’t you?” She smiles.

“Only if the truth is poetic.” I gently kiss the tip of her nose.

“I love you too. I love you so so so so so so so much!” She curls her head into my neck.

We kiss, her hands tangling in my hair.

I love feeling her, lying against me slightly breathless and completely amazing. We are one always, but in this moment we have no divide. I’m not alone anymore, this life is not a curse. My thoughts, my feelings, they aren’t just mine anymore. My love has equal claim to them. I no longer have to bare my existence completely alone. Under the pearl star-light our hearts have amalgamated.


End file.
